Dear Ellasyn,
The first time I held you I thanked God for giving me the moment; we weren't sure we would get it. There were so many uncertain moments of our pregnancy and delivery that I had almost convinced myself I wouldn't get to share these big moments with you. Your first year on this earth was also a test of faith and patience but every time we faced a hurdle you crushed it and came out stronger on the other end. Tonight I tucked you to bed and every moment of your life swept over me. Tomorrow, we wake up and you'll be in Kindergarten.
Sweet girl I have never been so proud. I can't believe that this moment has come, that tomorrow I will take you to school and we will begin the fast paced life of elementary school. You cried tonight at bedtime. All I could do was hold you, and hug you. I wanted the moment to last forever. I can't help but think it is partially because you're scared and the truth is baby; so am I. I am scared because I know this year will look so different than you deserve. I am scared that you will get in this routine and the world will come crashing to a halt again. You don't deserve that. If it does, you and I both know we will get through it because look at everything you've already overcome. Whatever this year looks like I know without a doubt you will have a million friends by the end of the first week. I know you will be the helper in the classroom, and Ms. Dunbar will be your favorite of the new friends. It's ok to be scared sweetheart, but I know you are going to rock this kindergarten thing. Not just because you are so smart, but because you are SO brave. It breaks my heart thinking of watching you walk away from me and into that school. Ugh, it makes me cry Ella, because you're my baby and I feel like this has all gone too fast! But I don't want you to be scared because I know you are ready.
You've faced some crazy battles in your little life sister, you've adapted to heartbreaking change and taught me about being brave and strong when it seems impossible. You've given me the Faith to believe in the future and you have reminded me to smile through it all. You bring sunshine where ever you go Lala, you make everyone laugh and you always have the perfect, quippy little anecdotes to throw in. Lord knows you keep me on my toes with the things that come out of your mouth. The truth is, I am little scared of that too! But, I know without a doubt your first day, and every day there after, will be another beautiful adventure for you. I am proud of you Ellasyn Faith, for the person you are and the one I know you are becoming. The world needs more people like you. Sing your songs at the top of your lungs and never stop dancing that silly little jig that keeps us all laughing. Big Brother will be there with you, you have no idea the comfort that brings me. He is proud of you too, he will be so excited to see you in the halls and help you learn the lay of the land. I bet he misses you when he is away from you! I bet you miss him too, and that's ok. I cherish the bond the two of you have developed, it has been so fun to watch you be friends. Enjoy every moment of this new adventure baby, it's going to go fast. There will be hard days and incredible days, and I'll be right beside you for all of them.
I am the luckiest woman in the world to get to be yours and TJ's mom. You make me proud every moment and I can't wait to hear all about your first day.
I love you my sweet girl,
Mom
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